I found out tonight that my sister has breast cancer. She still won't answer my calls.

I don't get this stupid fucking grudge. All I want is to talk to her and find out what the situation is and how she's doing and to ask if I can help. I don't even understand why she's so mad at everybody.

The only reason I know is because she told my nephew that she's dying. He had no details.

When my neice called to see what was going on, she said she saw no point in telling any of us because no one in this family cares about her. I don't know if she's intentionally picking these fights with everyone just to distance herself so she can deal with it alone or what. She fabricates these situations to make everything worse when really we all need each other right now and everyone's too fucking stubborn to just deal with shit. It's really fucking stupid.

I just feel sick and sad and pissed. I don't know what to do.

DisneyLand burned down.

Today was very Monday-ish.

Work was all busy and stressful and Amber quit, which didn't help things. She told me last week she was going to quit because she got another job, but I guess she ended up sending a text to my boss telling her she was quitting and moving back to California because she was leaving her husband. That turned out to be a big fat lie. I hate when people let me in on some insider info, but then forget to tell me important details like "OH YEAH THIS IS THE LIE I'M TELLING THE BOSS SO DON'T FUCK IT UP FOR ME."

So when my boss comes over to my desk today all sad like "Did you hear about Amber?" I'm all..."uhhhhhhhhhhhh." Quick thinker, that's what I am. Luckily I caught myself before I blurted out "OH YOU MEAN ABOUT HER COOL NEW JOB??" That...woulda been bad.

I dunno why she had to lie about it anyway. Suckers.

I obviously don't have anything to blog about so just read this:

Cheer me up!

I'm all grumped up today.

You guys wanna tell me a joke or something? That'd be cool. Do that.

A fat.

Just a little mid-afternoon delight...

Days like this totally make it worth having a website that tells you how people find your blog.

So...how's your Thursday goin'?

Don't forget Project Runway starts tonite tonite tonite tonite tonite tonite! 2Nite. Tonight.

Forreal.

I still hate Fred Durst.

Dear Dr. Atkins:

I fear that I have failed you yet again. I ate some pretzels.

All apologies,
Tricia

P.S. It wasn't my fault!

We had our semi-annual blood drive at work today and I usually always donate because a) it gets me off the phone for like a good half-hour... b) you usually get some free tickets to something ...and c) saving lives and whatnot. My dad practically lived on transfused blood through most of the 80s so I feel as though it's my karmic duty to pay a little back.

Well I went in there to do the interview thing where they ask you 5 million questions about whether or not you've even been to Mexico or fucked a prostitute or had sex with a man who had sex with another man. (no, no, yes, respectively. kidding...kinda.) Anywho the lady was like "you qualify to donate red blood cells, we would love for you to do that if you have a little extra time." For some reason, this came across to me like I just won some grand award or something. Extra time off the phone? Yes please.

Of course, I didn't know she meant TWO FREAKING HOURS. It wouldn't have really taken that long but the dude on the machine before me was what the lady lovingly called a "slow bleeder" so I had to wait around for a brick of time. Luckily for me, my daily aspirin makes me a "good bleeder" so if there's ever a contest over who can bleed to death the fastest, I got that shit in the bag. THE BODY BAG, that is! See what I did there? eh eh?

My boss kept coming in there like doing that thing people do where they look at their wrist like they're wearing some imaginary watch and saying "still??" Jesus lady, I'm bleeding as fast as I can!

Anyway, the process is like they take 2 pints, then put some saline or some junk in there and then the machine separates your red blood cells then gives you back your useless stinkin' blood. I didn't mind doing it, but I felt super weird the rest of the day. Like anytime I would stand up, I'd have a wicked head rush. My boss was like "you look pale, you should eat some cookies." I was all "no sir, no carbies!" Then I started to get the major woozies so I compromised and had a baggie of pretzels. 23g of carbs, so not TERRIBLE...but still. I forgive myself cause it's better than fainting and getting clowned at work.

So yeah, usually they give us like some pretty good show tickets for doing this jazz. This time they gave us a freaking tshirt and a certificate for a dang cookie. A COOKIE?? C'mon! I mean, I love cookies, don't get me wrong, but I'd rather have those Penn & Teller tickets they were giving out LAST month. Oh well.

Plus the shirt was like an XL...yeah right...how 'bout you add about 5 more Xs on there and we can talk? I stuffed my wide body in there like ground pork into a sausage casing so I could show you guys. Is that love or WHAT?

Yeah, that's Jeff's bathroom, and yes, he had just got off the toilet. Before you even ax. I don't care, I literally have no shame.

So that was my day. Now tell me about yours!

ALSO...you know, my work has like some of the comment boxes disabled and since I do most of my blog reading at work, sometimes I never get to comment some of you peeps. I dunno what the application is that's making it block or else I'd ask you all to kindly remove it. I just don't want you cats thinkin' I'm some stuck up bitch who thinks she's too cool to comment. So...yeah.

Winner winner low-carb dinner...

Whew...one whole completely carbless day down. Cutting the insulin seems to have worked so that's a relief. As far as being diabetic goes, I'm not the best, but I am trying a little harder since I think it would make my mom sad to see me being so lackluster with my health given the fact that she died from like all the shit I have now. I'm trying, Mom! Kindly lay off. Thanks, love ya!

We went to trivia tonite and actually DIDN'T LOSE! Well, 2nd place, which any Ricky Bobby fan will tell you is really just the 1st Loser, but it's still better than 4th! I got a couple good ones so I was happy. Truth be told, I think we only won because the British dude was back in town. That dude is too dang smart. He knows the headscratchers that we always have to guess on. Good times.

It was also Angel's birthday so there was CAKE. Those dirty fucking bastards. I stayed strong. Not even a bite. You guys shoulda seen me...I was in rare form. "Cake? Oh heavens no. None for me, thanks!" So everyone around me ate cake and drank beer and I had like 6 damn glasses of water. Kinda made me feel like an asshole, but whatever. I'm over it and I feel accomplished, so it was worth it. Cake looked kinda dry anyway (not that I still wouldn't have buried my face in there and motorboated that sumbitch.)

Here's some pics, then I'm going to sleep cause I am freaking tired. Nite dudes.

About 30 candles short, but whatever...

Dirty cake bandit.

Documented proof that we don't suck that bad when there's at least one british dude present to answer all the questions about American History.

Fonzin' it.

Taking you as low as you go...

My own stupidness led me to break the no-carb rule yesterday. Gah. Like a dummy, I took my full shot of insulin on Sunday night without even thinking that I'd be eating no carbs all day Monday. Needless to say, I got a little low.

I was actually fine until I started driving home from work. The low blood sugar mixed with the molten hot afternoon weather made for an interesting 10 minute drive home, to say the least. I got this weird dizzy highness that I've only felt one other time before, in an incident I like to call "The Dentist's Office, 1997." The ceiling tiles started dancing around and I freaked out and ripped the mask thing off my face and started mumbling some junk about not liking it and I swore off the gas forever! SuperNerd.

Luckily I didn't do anything stupid yesterday like crash or die. I found some LifeSavers in the center console and took care of business even though they were all chewy and melty and weird. Another victim of the Las Vegas heat, but at least they helped. I got home and had some juice and all was well again. Still...pretty stupid. Rookie mistake!

I cut my dosage in half last night so we'll see how today fares. I got my emergency hard candies crammed in the bottom of my purse now like a true elderly-lady-about-town. Whatevs...gots to do what we gots to do.