Wednesday, August 5, 2009


So yeah, we went "swimming." Pfft. Some teacher that Jeff turned out to be. It's like...

"alright, do this..."
"(dunk) ACK I CANT DO THAT! HOW??"
"do it like this..."
"well, I dunno...prolly should get you some lessons or something. I'm gonna go to the jacuzzi, it's cold."
"(silent hate.)"

That sucked! I dunno why I thought I would be able to learn in like one night. I came to the conclusion that I hate putting my head under water. It just feels like...impending doom. No sir, I don't like it.

Oh well, at least I tried, kinda. I stayed in the water for over an hour kicking my feet like a fatass toddler so I could at least get some form of exercise. I learned how to tread water, so that's good. I just panic when my toes can't touch the bottom so I'm still pretty useless in the water, but that's life for a panicky Tricia.

Hey, I got some mail today! I got Chuck back in the mail with a bitchin' necklace from Camevil! I'm not sure if it was supposed to be a choker, but it was a choker on me because of my extra fat neck. I can't really wear it yet unless I wanna die, but I'm hoping I'll be able to wear it and continue breathing soon. It's awesome, check it:

There's also pretty beads and stuff you can't see because of my neckfurters. I love it!
I also got a nice little card from Simone all the way from the UK! It was all cute and British. Thanks pal!
Minnie's cubicle o'balloons turned out to be an awesome ordeal all day. We kept refilling her cubicle everytime she left her desk. If you can't pester a 70 year old, who, I ask, can you pester?? She was a good sport and she really liked the GIANT pill case full of candy. She kept talking about how she could use it for her vitamins. If I see her ever using that thing for real, I'll prolly die laughing.

Balloons kick ass.

Especially this one.
In leiu of a giant hot fudge sundae, I ended up just having a scoop of vanilla with from fresh strawberries. I really haven't been eating all my points, and I'm up a pound, so maybe I need to eat more...I dunno. Feels wrong even saying that. But I go to bed with like 10-15 left every night. I'm gonna be pissed if I gain this week after thinking I'm kicking much ass. WE WILL SEE.
I tired...I go nite nite now.
OH WAIT, I got emailed by that same weird Dr that emailed Jack Sh*t about adding my blog to some HealthSpring website or some shit. I was all jazzed to be onboard, but then Jack said it was all a big scam and took a dump all up in my whole grain Cheerios (get your free sample here!). So either it's all crap, or Jack wants all the fame and attention for himself. It's hard to say with that guy sometimes...


big_mummy said...

OK i have to bullet point so i don't forget my points.......
1. Jeff man, he sucks, tell him that from me.
2. Although i do agree you need proper lessons, and a nose clip maybe (i would pay to see you wearing it if that helps)
3. Love the choker, but not the inability to breath.
4.omg how big is that pill box??? seriously it looks dayglo too!
5. well done on forfeiting the sundae but i want to nag you about your points. You NEED your points woman. If you don't use them your body goes all starvation and shit and holds onto your fat. Give it a week and see if it makes a difference. If it doesnt I will let you chose my punishment!

Tantra Flower said...

Yeah don't ever let a guy teach you to do anything like swim or drive. They suck at that. Get proper swimming lessons at the YWCA. They taught my son to float when he was an infant. They rule.

That is a cool choker.

@eloh said...

One step at a time. No real need to get your face under water to learn to swim. Try the "back stroke", it is the easiest to do and learn. If I ever get left in the middle of the ocean, I'll be doing the back stroke right before I get eaten by sharks.

~ugly girl with a beautiful heart~ said...

Getting lessons from friends, family, significant others that aren't trained to get lessons is like asking your little brother to fix your vomiting dog because he liked science in high school. Not a good idea yo! However, kudos for staying in the water and moving! You don't have to be an olympic swimmer to get something out of it, the water is resistant and as long as you're moving you're burning those cals!

Gah! I LOVE that necklace! It's badass.

You know, she sure doesn't look 70. Are you sure she's 70? Love the pill case, you're awesome!

Dana said...

I am no nutritionist but I would say you should work on getting closer to your points goal everyday. Especially if you gain again. I think when we don't eat enough, even when trying to lose weight, our body goes in to starvation mode and wants to 'hold on' to what we have. It sucks I know but that's the problem I have had in the past!

On the swimming thing, it's great exercise but you don't even need to actually swim. Do they have any water aerobics classes you can sign up for? If not find someone to go to the pool with you a few times a week or even once a week and work out in the pool for a half hour. You can go in the shallow end and just walk back and forth across the pool, run, they even have foam weights for the pool that weigh nothing in air but get them in some water and you are working out! I took a water aerobics class once, and I loved it!

Wow, that was long :)

TJ said...

- think you need to get a new swim coach. lol :)
-I love that pill box! very old-age-ish!
-love the necklace- I could adjust that for ya! :) what are your favorite colors for future reference BTW?

wildfluffysheep said...

lol at Sarah! points and all....

dont't give up on the swimming. i get panicky when my feet don't touch the bottom too. i have a fear of drowning.

yay you got my card eventually woot
awesome necklace! cant wait to see Chuck!

you do rule...

Pam said...

I agree that you have to eat your points girl. Take a couple spoonfuls of peanut butter throughout the day. Eat avocados. Almonds. All those things are high in points and really high in healthy fats.
Swimming just takes practice. Lots of practice. Keep getting in the water and treading, you will begin to trust yourself and before you know it, you'll be heading off to that deep side without anyone telling you how to do it. Staying on the plan AND exercising too? You are doing GREAT!!!!

Jack Sh*t, Gettin' Fit said...

Maybe that outfit that emailed you IS on the up-and-up. You could use this brand new website I recently discovered ( to check them out. Include the word "scam" in your search and you get about 7 million hits.

I got your back, girl.

Tricia said... You lost me.

arielcircleofnine said...

lovin the choker, agreed on the noseclip, kudos on no ice cream sundae and agreed totally on EAT YER PERNTS WOMAN!!!!
I would have NO problem filling my gullet with sweet delicious foods. LOL am I too enthused? heheheh seriously though, my hubby calls it going "catabolic" which Im not sure is a word, though it probably is, I like the way big_mummy said it: "your body goes all starvation and shit and holds onto your fat!"
sounds like youre doing great, even with the bunko swim lesson from Jeff! keep on keepin on babaaayyyy!!

Carlos said...

love the choker hate your swim coach!

Dina said...

Fuck Jeff and his whack ass flat top.

Love the choker, so jealous!

Yay for treading water, that's grrreeeaattt!

Learning to be Less said...

I thought I was the only one who enjoyed harassing old ladies (I am an ocassional stalker).

Oh man, they do love those pill containers. They never see them as the joke they are intended to be.

Tina said...

Those pictures are great! Very creative!

Losing it in Vegas said...

HEY!!! You gave away my pillbox!

Nice choker...let's hope that soon it fits, I have a few like that too.

Eat your seriously need them. Metabolism, metabolism, metabolism...

MackAttack said...

I'm signed up for that website that emailed Jack yesterday, (got the email a few months ago) so far I haven't had any positive or negative experiences from it.

Swimming takes awhile to master, keep it up!

dani31608 said...

Love the choker!

Keep at the swimming. It takes time! I recently taught my son to swim and it took a few weeks but after he got used to the water (I think everyone is OMG!DROWN! by nature), he was fine.

bbubblyb said...

Yea, I'm signed up for that website too, I'm with Mack no really positives or negatives. Sorry the swim coach sucks lol. That's cool you got a gift when chuck came home. Sounds like you're having a good week.

Camevil said...

Oh, poop.

LAF said...

Hey, a "skeleton key" I just got it!

Tony said...

Weight fluctuations happen all the time. Just keep eating within your points and lose the sodium filled foods (if you are eating a lot of them). Oh, and swimming is a bitch, I will never learn how to do a basic stroke right.

Julie said...

That swimming lessons sucks.

I love the chocker. lol!

I laughed so hard when I saw the balloons and the 70 yr old with the huge pill case. Did she share the candy you had put in it??

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