Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Straight outta Compton...

Yeah yeah, I know.

I been having some dang hard times lately, you guys.

I broke my back. Well, not really. But it feels like it! It sucks. I move around in a very elderly fashion making the "OW MY BACK!" face about every 4 steps. Very annoying during this Halloween shopping season. I went to the doctor and she sent me to get an x-ray which was an altogether awkward and humiliating experience involving two hot x-ray techs and a hospital gown that wasn't even close. Seriously. I mean, not...even...close.

Two days later, I get this message on my voicemail..."Hi this is blah-blah from Dr. BlahBlah's office and we got your test results back. Normal results. Okay, thanks, bye." Ugh. Doubleyou-tee-eff. Now I just assume they thought I was faking to get pills, which I didn't even TAKE, mind you. No mention of a follow-up or referral or MRI or anything that might actually be helpful. So annoying. This doctor is really starting to get on my nerves. I realize she's a doctor and her station in life is significantly more important that just a lowly phone jockey like me, but she won't respond to emails or messages I send. I always have to go in. And that's a giant pain in the ass when she works the same hours I do and she could easily just pick up a phone and call in a referral for me. I'm thinking of just finding a new doctor. Which is another pain in the ass. Everything is annoying!

Work is stressful. I'm happy to have my job. I'm grateful to be working during these awful economic times. But man, stress. It sucks because I actually do like my job. I mean the customers get annoying at times and it does make me hate old people, but other than that, it's the best job I've ever had. But it just feels scary. It feels like any given day could be your last or like I could drive up tomorrow and the gates could be locked up and I'd be screwed. It's just tension and pins and needles and walking on eggshells every day. Working at a bank is always kinda scary cause they just switch owners like kids trading baseball cards, but it's even worse when times are hard, and well...times are freaking hard. I'm just hoping for the best and trying to keep my head down and not rock any boats.

You know, despite the back and the work stress, I've actually been doing remarkably well on the dieting front. I'm weird because I'm like the opposite of most weight loss bloggers. When I'm doing terrible, I can blog every day about all the random crap going on in my life. But when I'm doing well, being on plan, I feel boring and can't decide what to blog about. "Today I ate some lettuce...the world is a vampire. The end." Although I agree that would make an awesome blog, it's just not me. I am a rambler and I need to ramble on. Incessantly. About dumb shit.

So I saw a 3 at the beginning of my weight for the first time in a while, but it ended up being a fluke. Curses! The next morning I was up 4 pounds, so I think it was just my scale messing with my emotions. But...I'm still headed in the right direction, and that's good. I'm going home for a few days in early December and if I can lose a few before then, that'd just be swell. I don't want the Southwest lady giving me another lecture about their seating policy. YEAH, I GET IT, THANKS. The armrest goes down, can't charge me twice. Sorry, rules is rules, Southwest.

Sorry this is such a boring post, but hey, at least I blogged. Beggars can't be choosers, dudes.

Also, how've you been?

24 comments:

Dani @ PFL said...

"Today I ate some lettuce...the world is a vampire. The end."

Love it.

I hope your back feels better soon! And honestly, your "voice" comes through whatever you blog about so it's never boring.

Julie Hoover said...

Glad to hear you haven't fallen down at Costco or something like that :)

Unknown said...

Hope you back gets better soon! I think its cool to walk around lookin like a lil old lady..oh wait, only cuz thats what I do all day. lol It's HIP to be OLD!

Hang in there T, you will see that 3 soon! :)

screwdestiny said...

Hey, don't be such a stranger. Your ramblings brighten my dull, dull days. I'm sorry about your back. Hope it gets better soon. And it's good to hear that you've been on plan. Keep on keepin' on.

Dina said...

How are you posting? Are you at home? WTF! Anyhow, hang in there.

theantijared said...

You ate lettuce today!!!!

What kind, was it a crisp romaine or a robust iceburg???

Why leave us in suspense!!!!!!!!

Shelley said...

Sorry about your back...but can I say how excited I am for you, seeing a "3" on the scale?!? Good going, Tricia!!!

Erin said...

i just wanted to tell you...i am so in love with that...veggie/dip thermos thingamagig you sent me. for. reals.

sucks about the back! but it's good to have you back, whether you're on the DL or not...

go get em, tiger!

Tantra Flower said...

I would totally change doctors. Sometimes they forget that they are working FOR us.

It's great to see a post from you. I hope you feel better soon. xox

Erin said...

you've been awarded!

its not a box full of goodies, but its what i got to give :)

Grace said...

I hate doctors who don't seem to give a shit about their patients. Definitely find another doctor!

Cole Walter Mellon said...

It may my day to hear that you're taking this weight-loss business seriously. As much as I adore your posts, I'll sacrifice a lil entertainment for some progress on that front.

Sorry about the back though, and the work-induced stress tho. That's tough.

arielcircleofnine said...

Im like you, if Im doing well I wont really say that much, or just the cursory blip-recap....when Im fucking up LIKE NOW, then Im blogging.
Whatever you blog is cool dude, I'll read it!
Glad you're eating the lettuce too. I havent eaten a green veggie in a while.....

Amy said...

I've got the weeble wobble walk goin' on, too. My foot is killing me. meh.

Unknown said...

I just started blogging and have found your blog and started reading! Im loving it so far! Good luck on your journey!

big_mummy said...

you could ramble about lettuce, there are so many different kinds, how was it cut? crispy or soggy etc.

congrats on the 3.... it might stay, you never know.

KrysTros said...

Love the Smashing Pumpkins reference. Anyway, if you are not happy with your doctor than get a new one! I finally, after years of going to non caring doctors, have found one I love, love, love. I mean if she moves to Alaska, I am going too! She finally found the problem. I don't know how she sees every appt on time but she does and all the while making you feel like you are her only patient and listening to every single thing you say. If you are not getting what you need from your doc then it's time to move on!

Shhhhh said...

Good luck finding a new doc. Sucks that yours is such a dumbass.

Hope you can get that 3 back and make it stick!

bbubblyb said...

Hope your back feels better soon. I know I would like your ramblings on any topic so losing weight or not go for it *smile*. Glad to hear the scale is liking you these days though.

wildfluffysheep said...

im a beggar and im choosey :D

<3 *hugs* hope your back feels better soon, missus! And things get less stressful. <3

NaN said...

Interesting article in November's Good Housekeeping magazine about back problems. Apparently, surgery helps very few people. Time, exercise, over the counter medications, acupuncture, spinal manipulation, and epidurals are what they recommend. Good luck!

foolsfitness said...

I'm thinking stress has got to be a part of the back thing too. So many people at my work are on edge too. I know friends out of work that are hard workers and people I'd want to have work for me if I had a business. I know I stress out about wondering what will tommorow bring too. I've actually got to the point of carrying a serenity prayer coin to remind me of the whole wisdom and there are somethings I can not change... I try to catastrofize (SP?) less, because there is enough "now" stuff to deal with.

I messed up my back sometime ago and went to a (sp?) chiropractor for over a year. It was expensive but I can function a lot better than I had before. I still can't overdo. It's kind of frustrating looking at that 50 pound of whatever I want to pick up and say, "I don't think I should pick that up." but better than trying to and ending up horizontal in a ball of pain.

I hope you are joking about refering to yourself as "lowley" I guess I could say I'm not far up on the food chain at my work either... but it doesn't mean that I don't do a part or try to do it well. Don't put yourself down, even in a passing comment. You are no less of a human being than anyone else... Never forget your intrinsic worth. You are art of God.

But at Foolsfitness we value the intrinsic worth of all halloween candy!- Alan

Pam said...

Find a new doctor. As much of a pain in the ass as that may be...do it. I hate most doctors. Arrogant and egotistical SOB's. And oh hey they LOVE to blame every problem on our weight! I went in once with a navel infection and the doctor told me, "well it's because of your obesity. Just lose weight and you won't have any more navel infections." I wanted to say "well gee if I'd have known that I would have lost the weight years ago! Thanks for the sage advice doc!"
Find a new doc and one that you're comfortable with and one who views you as an actual human being and not just another out of control obesity-by-choice fat person. Good doctors are out there...trust me. Unfortunately it's the bad ones who can likely be blamed for a lot of early obesity-related deaths. If they weren't such mean & disrespectful assholes, a lot of obese people wouldn't be afraid to consult them about health issues more often. Most of us are just afraid of getting our feelings hurt. Newsflash to doctors: Fat people have worth!
oopss...sorry...rantflash...sorry.
Find a new doctor chica.

Community said...

The baby boomers are starting to turn 60 this year. A huge number of older women WITH MONEY will be looking for fashions designed to flatter older bodies.

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