Alright, pay attention because this might jump around a lot.
So, somehow, some way, last night I think I accidentally agreed to having a second job. BUT...I think Jeff's mom is seriously off her rocker, so I dunno. So here's the conversation as best as I can remember...
Momz: OH HEY, we're buying a Curves!
Momz: Yeah, we're getting our own Curves!
Me: Wha...you don't have any money...how?
Momz: Well, we're buying it for a dollar.
Momz: They're gonna lose it, so they're gonna sell it to us for a dollar instead.
Momz: Yeah, and it's gonna be family-run! You can have Wednesdays and Saturdays!
Me: I don't understand...is this how business works? I am lost.
Momz: Well, we're buying a Curves for a dollar and you can work there, ok?
Me: Yeah, okay, I guess.
Momz: OH I'm only having 4 beers tonite...I'm having a colonoscopy in the morning.
Me: I don't think you're supposed to....(sigh)...Ok, Deb.
For the record, she drank SEVEN.
As much as I don't wanna fucking work at Curves, I'm pretty confident that this plan was somehow way misconstrued and will, shockingly, not work out. Only time will tell. If you can buy franchises for a buck, I'll take a Popeyes. Hells yeah, son.
Let's move on, okay? Let's talk about my fucking jacket at work today. First of all, allow me to remind you that it is FUCKING HOT here already. Now, you guys should already know that we have to wear those shitty blazers at work now. I mean, I bitch about it all the time, so if you don't know then hello new person and welcome to my blog. So anyway, Amber forgot her dumb ass blazer this morning and FUCKING PANDAMONIUM BROKE OUT.
So about 20 minutes later, I get approached by "the bosses." I'm like oh shit, this is it, they saw me talking about something dirty online and now I'm fired. Shit! Turns out, they didn't... WHEW... I live to talk filthy for another day. They want me to let Amber borrow my jacket on her lunch and breaks! WTF! I mean, whatever, I said okay, but I won't lie and say it didn't feel weird as shit. I mean, my jacket pockets are like filled to the max with receipts and my cell phone and tootsie roll pop wrappers and shit. Let's just say, it wasn't expecting guests.
Then I went to lunch and it was like the surface of the sun in my car and my arms were getting sweaty under my jacket sleeves and i was like "GROSS, now I gotta pass this sweaty ass jacket off to the next victim and she's gonna be all GOD THIS SWEATY BITCH!" I dunno. It was uncomfortable. I'm always too fat to share clothes, so this was a first for me. Germophobia, ABOUT FACE!
Next topic: The packing is getting done slowly but surely.
Yet another topic: Dear Dina and Twinkleydots...please stop all the fussin' and a'fightin. I feel like a child in the middle of a bitter divorce custody case. Who do you love more? Your mommy or your other mommy? That means you guys are lesbians. OUTTED! You heard it here first, folks.
NEXT: HERE'S a link to some pictures I drew a long time ago when I had no online friends and my computer would only do MSPaint and Solitaire. They are pretty dumb, and dare I say some are of 'questionable' nature, but I don't think they will get you sent to Hell or anything unless you were already on the way there, you heathen! Have fun and whatnot. Or don't. I'm not the boss of you!
I guess that's it. There was something else I wanted to talk about, but this is already massive, plus there's always tomorrow. Bye :)