I ditched work yesterday because of the post-chiro stiffness and active hatred of my job, in general. BUT today's Friday so that means 4 more hours of work then two days off, sweeeeeeeeet.
I'm on day 4 or YE OLDE CORE. I keep fucking up eating real cheese on stuff though so I may as well be counting points, but I don't think I'm eating enough so whatever. I'm eating LESS, so like, that should count for something.
I didn't pack lunch so I had to order a salad from a local delivery place and OMG MOST BORING SALAD EVER. (and I was listening to Coldplay on my iPod, which may or may not have added to the boringness.) Lettuce, cucumber, grilled chicken. No dressing. No croutons. No cheese! Dry, dude. Dryer than Ann Coulter's vag the night Obama won. I mean, that's pretty dry right there, friends.
Whatever, it's just food. I'm trying to learn to hate food so I won't want it. So far it is not working because I would seriously stab a man for a Twix right now.
You guys watch The Office last nite? So cute.
What was I talking about? Oh yeah, food. So...yeah, anyway, while I was laying around being in pain all day yesterday, Discovery Health Network decided to show a bunch of those shows from that one obesity hospital whatever it's called, you know the one. MAN. Why did one of the spotlighted people like weigh less than me?? Ugh, that made me feel like a total fat load. I mean, I usually watch that show so I can feel smallish and now they're showing people that I outweigh by a good 50 pounds. UGH! Remind me never to watch TV again.
Being addicted to food is such a weak ass addiction. I wish it was something more hardcore, like crack! Then at least I'd be thin and not sweating bullets that I won't be able to walk up the stupid 1/4 mile hill leading up to Alcatraz on my vacation. Who the hell goes on vacation to visit a prison? I just wanna lay on the beach and drink pina coladas. They said it's the incline of like a 13 story building. THAT SUCKS. I'm gonna need a post-vacation vacation and now I'm outta sick time.
That last line read like the punchline to a Garfield comic.