Friday, June 12, 2009

Let your freak flag fly!

Have you guys seen the new Simpsons stamps? SO AWESOME. God, how I love them.
I finally got around to picking up a book of them when I went to the post office last week and I've been dying to USE THEM. I still have Fight Fat Phobia stickers up for grabs, people! You know you need this in your life! Email me if you want one. (fight.fat.phobia@gmail.com)

Of course, probably no one will want me mailing stuff to them now that Dina outted me as a butt plug sender, but what she didn't tell you guys is that she begged me to send that thing. I am a pleaser. A woman of the people. I only wanna put a smile in the heart of every freak I know. Like a modern-day Mother Teresa, only not really like that at all. You know? I know you guys understand.

HEY...somewhere along the way I crept above 100 followers. That is awesome! It boggles the mind, seriously. A few months ago I said to myself that I would do a giveaway when I reached 100 followers so it looks like that will be happening soon. I don't really know what to give away though. I'm looking for a theme. I was thinking like a Pamper Yourself Package or something...I dunno. Gimme some time to make this awesome, then we'll go from there.

You guys have any tips? Like, if you were gonna win something, what would you want? Don't say money. Or a car. Think frugal!

Since I have made it my purpose in life to be more like Jack Sh*t, I wanted to mention that I ALSO was contacted by a nice lady at POM who sent me a case of FREE pomegranate juice. I love free, and I love juice, so this was a match made in heaven. I'm planning on mixing up some fancy POM cocktails this weekend and getting crunk alone in my apartment like a REAL WINNER! We have accumulated a variety of booze in the apartment from people who come to visit me and think they need to buy gallons of alcohol because they're in VEGAS BABY, then they take like 4 shots and leave the bottle at my house. So...I'll post some slurred reviews at some point this weekend if time allows. No one reads these blogs on the weekends anyway so it won't be so bad if I make a drunken admission to some sin long forgotten or something. FREEDOM!

Oh yeah, speaking of Vegas, I forced Jeff to take me to see The Hangover last night after work. SO GREAT! We laughed, we cried, and I think maybe, JUST MAYBE, we both learned a little something about life. I saw Zack Galifinakis' penis. Honk honk! That guy is so underrated, and so is his wang. When we left, we were walking through the casino to get to the parking lot, and Jeff's all "man, I wish I had a nice cock like Galifinakis." Dude. Definitely in the Top 5 of the gayest things that have ever come out of his mouth. The other top four being actual dicks. I was like "Look, you can't SAY stuff like that! You're supposed to by my heterosexual boyfriend, REMEMBER?" and he's all "I just said it was nice, I didn't say I wanted it in me." Totally reassuring, forreal.

What's with all the penis envy lately anyway? Geez. Embrace your schlong, dudes. My sister-in-law's stepdad recently found out he has cancer like IN his dick. We're not talking like Lance Armstrong cut-off-a-ball-become-a-hero-cancer, but like actual cancer of the dick. So they had to cut out a chunk of it. So...I dunno, be glad you have a whole one, I guess. And if you don't...that sucks, dude. You feel free to bitch because you deserve it, fella.
This is a weird ass random entry, so I'll just stop here. Have a good weekend!

9 comments:

LAF said...

Wow, you ARE the modern-day Mother Theresa. Here I am feeling sorry for myself that I need to lose a ton of weight...BUT...at least I'm not a guy with a big chunk cut out of his dick. I DO feel somewhat better. Thanks for returning my email the other day, too. I'll look forward to a crazy POM post this weekend.

Jessica said...

Hahahaha.
Okay though- what about boob envy?

Art said...

I have a whole penis, small as it may be, so I'm pretty thankful. Haha.

Julie said...

I need stickers.... will you ship them to Canada eh?? lol!

You have many followers because everyone is hoping for a classy Tricia butt plug ;)

Those stamps are cool!

~ugly girl with a beautiful heart~ said...

I agree with Julie! Haha!

And Jessica, what about boob envy? Although, my Nana did have only a boob and a half due to cancer...hmmm...well I still want bigger ones.

Jack Sh*t, Gettin' Fit said...

If they sent me and you free POM, somebody at that company needs to lose their job. ;)

I'm kinda ticked off at you right now, cuz when I read "that's the gayest thing that's ever come out of his mouth," I was already formulating my "Y'mean, besides actual dicks?" comment. And then you beat me to the punch. Damn your witty ways!

wildfluffysheep said...

Awesome frickin' stamps! :D

I think its well cool you sent the butt plug! :D

Bring on the give away. Man, thats bad sorry. I just love the chance of free stuffs.

arielcircleofnine said...

Love the stamps...I think you should give away a handful(pun intended!) of special edition numbered TRICIA buttplugs. You gotta personally bling each one of them out--no two alike!

Dina said...

Where the fuck is my free Pom? I'm way better than THE BOTH OF YOUSE. I call bull shit.

I thought you said those stamps looked LIKE SHIT. Now you're all changing your tune.

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