We had our first weigh-in yesterday for the Biggest Loser Challenge at work. I lost 2.8, which is good, but not as great as I was expecting. While most people would look at 2.8 as a respectable loss, it was my first week and I have over 200 pounds to lose, so I have to remember to look at the whole picture as opposed to wanting 2-digit losses like the people on TV. That being said, it definitely wasn't a picture-perfect week, but I don't wanna make excuses. There are at least 3 times that come to mind when I should have eaten better and I know I could have at least done SOME exercise, even if I do still have limited mobility.
Plus, at least now I know the 400.0 last week wasn't a fluke and I am for sure under 400 for now. And hopefully forever. I think I have the right mindset right now. I just hope I can make it last. Don't wanna get cocky because then I fall off my game and I end up back at Day One for the millionth time.
Home life has been stressful due to some rearranging of Jeff's work schedule. I think we just get along better when we're not around each other very much, which is a sad state of affairs when you're talking about your boyfriend. Not really sure how all this is going to pan out, but maybe it won't be as terrible as I'm thinking. I'm not really sure what I'm doing with my life at this point. I think it's easy when you're on a fast track to a cholesterol-related death to lose sight of where you actually wanna go with your life. When things start to fall into place, then you start wondering if the years are worth saving if you're just going to be miserable. Change begets change? Or maybe I'm all talk...who knows.
Man, this a depressing ass post. Does it help if I say I'm eating an orange that's the size of a baby's head? Like a fat James Gandolfini-style baby. A fat, italian baby. Obviously from the Jersey Shore, due to the skin color.